So I've been thinking about something that I noticed yesterday. I know that I have always felt comfortable with Ryan. He is great when I need someone to talk to or just to hug on and cry. He always just knows when I need that. It's like he knows me so well that the tiniest change in me clues him in to exactly what I need from him. He is awesome in that way.
Yesterday while in the waiting room at the dr office - while waiting to get the ultrasound and exam to make sure baby and mom were ok - Ryan and I were just sitting there. (If you haven't read previous post, you may be a little lost about this...) I was trying not to get too upset and keep my composure. I mean, we didn't yet know if anything was wrong, so I was trying to remind myself of that and wait until I knew before I got emotional. So Ryan reaches over and puts his hand on mine. As soon as his skin touched mine, tears started to form. I realized that he makes me feel so comfortable that just a touch can release what I am really feeling. He allows me to do that. But at this moment, I didn't WANT to do that, so I actually had to ask him not to. I felt bad, but he seemed to really understand. I knew that if he was close to me in that way, I would release everything and just start crying right there in the waiting room. So, we just sat and didn't show our emotions until we saw the baby on the monitor.
I've always known that I was so comfortable with Ryan, but guess I never quite realized just how comfortable he could make me. I never realized that one touch from him could push this button to allow me to let everything loose and show what was really going on in me. How incredible to be married to someone that can do that for me.
I love my husband.